Reno, half a man, nothing more
by Vampire Turk
Summary: After a failed mission, Reno blames himself for what happened and starts to have a breakdown. Songfic of Evanescence's "My Immortal"


I do not own Reno or the Turks (but I'd love to borrow him for a date XDD)

Characters are (c) Square-enix, Tetsuya Nomura

* * *

**My Immortal**

**I'm so tired of being here  
Suppressed by all my childish fears**

A loud crescendo of thunder pounded the locked wooden door. A man raised his head, dried tears fallen down his face.

**And if you have to leave  
I wish that you would just leave  
'Cause your presence still lingers here  
And it won't leave me alone**

Reno dropped his face into a tear-stained pillow. Rude was gone. His best friend was gone. All because he decided to endanger their lives. A mission gone wrong. A failed mission.

**These wounds won't seem to heal  
This pain is just too real  
There's just too much that time cannot erase**

The redhead rolled off the couch, grasping the edge to get up. _I should've taken the shot . . . it was my fault. . . He's dead because of me . . ._ His hand slipped, brushing the sharp end of an exposed Bowie knife, the blade slicing his fingers.

**When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears  
And I held your hand through all of these years  
But you still have  
All of me**

**You used to captivate me  
By your resonating light  
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind**

". . . Damn it . . ." Reno winced swallowing, curling his hand. His legs gave out from under him, his open hand reaching for the knife, and his head hit the edge of the metal bar. The redhead lay on the floor, a gash forming on his forehead. Reno shut his eyes, hoping he wouldn't pass out. He was half a Turk, half a life, half a man - no one could fill the missing parts. The horrible realization stung deep, his eyes stinging with more tears.

**  
Your face it haunts  
My once pleasant dreams  
Your voice it chased away  
All the sanity in me **

These wounds won't seem to heal  
This pain is just too real  
There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears  
And I held your hand through all of these years  
But you still have  
All of me  


The Turk dragged himself into the bedroom, his head aching. He slumped against a wall, fingering the knife in his hand. _. . . I killed him . . ._ Reno wiped his eyes, his throat tightening. It had been simple - find the leaked source, make him talk, and kill him.

_. . . I fucked up ._ . . The redhead slid the blade into his skin, drawing two long deep lacerations across his wrist. _Tseng was right - Rude's dead because of me . . . I can't do anything to bring him back . . . His death is my fault . . . _He dropped the knife, the blade falling from his grip. Reno felt himself fall sideways. _. . . Rude . . . I'm . . . sorry. . . _

**I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone  
But though you're still with me  
I've been alone all along**

The thumping sound stopped, the door being forced open. Elena was the first to enter, catching small puddles of blood growing larger on the carpet. Behind her was Tseng. The two Turks began to search the apartment for their missing comrade, but it didn't take long for the blonde to find the redhead facedown in the dark bedroom.

**When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears  
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears**

" . . . Reno?" Elena nervously turned him over, hoping he wasn't dead. Her eyes traced the scars on his arms. She balanced his head against her shoulder, noticing a deep cut on his left temple. His skin was pale, and he looked miserably thin.

"Reno, please answer me." The redhead forced both eyes open, glancing up at the blonde, black circles lining them. " . . . Thank god you're alive."

**  
And I held your hand through all of these years**

Reno just slowly shook his head, tears forming in his dull gaze. ". . . Can't say the same for Rudo . . . " His voice cracked, several tears trickling down his face.

**But you still have  
All of me**


End file.
